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**Fidget** · 08-01-2010, 12:49 AM

Great read, well done & thanks

lwhite53 · 09-01-2010, 04:36 AM

I've just re-read the whole story at one go (I printed it out) and I'm stunned anew by how good it is. The plot is well conceived, the various threads masterfully controlled, the action convincing, the dialogue true. But more than that, the nuanced writing really is superb. All the little moments -- between Harry and Ruth, Lucas and Ros, Ros and Wendy, Ruth and Bushra, Lucas and Harry -- are just amazing. Your understanding of these characters is somewhat scary. Truly, congratulations -- this is great stuff!

**JHyde** · (This post was last modified: 09-01-2010 06:36 AM by JHyde.)

lwhite53, thankyou so much. It's rare for me to get feedback on my writing as I so rarely show it to people. I can only thank Kudos for creating characters I'm so invested in.

I have no idea what my next fan fic will be about, or through whose eyes I will tell it. But I'm hoping inspiration will strike soon - this is the scariest part about writing. But the high I get from finishing a piece I like is very addictive, so there will definitely be more.

I'm really touched you printed it, as did Tyger. That makes me feel very valuable! There's a wonderful writer on fanfiction.net whose fiance works for a publishing house. He managed to track down which stories were hers (she doesn't show him), print them out and present them as a bound volume for Christmas as a proper book. How gorgeous!

The only problem is that I've gone back and edited every entry, and am cringing at the the thought of you and Tyger having mistakes all through yours.

kirmostar · 09-01-2010, 10:11 AM

Beautiful ending - you almost have me converted HR wise!
My favourite line......"Lucas tilted his head" - bless! Smile

**JHyde** · 09-01-2010, 10:38 AM

Well, I didn't kill him, which I thought you'd be happy about Smile

lwhite53 · 09-01-2010, 03:01 PM

(09-01-2010 05:21 AM)JHyde Wrote: I'm really touched you printed it, as did Tyger. That makes me feel very valuable! There's a wonderful writer on fanfiction.net whose fiance works for a publishing house. He managed to track down which stories were hers (she doesn't show him), print them out and present them as a bound volume for Christmas as a proper book. How gorgeous!

The only problem is that I've gone back and edited every entry, and am cringing at the the thought of you and Tyger having mistakes all through yours.

I"d much rather read hard copy than a computer screen -- generational difference, I guess.

Some friends of mine had my doctoral dissertation printed and bound as a gift and it's an amazing thing -- tooled leather binding, marbleized end-papers, stamped gold leaf print. It's a pretty heady feeling to receive something like that.

Re the revisions -- Not to worry, I'll just print it out again. Wink

HellsBells · 09-01-2010, 07:04 PM

Okay, I'll own up to printing it out as well ! It is just excellent and deserves to be a hard copy...if you know what I mean. Now I can re-read it whenever I want to.

**JHyde** · 10-01-2010, 12:43 AM

I prefer to read things from a hard copy as well, and I write in hard copy too. I'm comforted that J.K Rowling does this as well!

Thanks again guys x

deathbymascara · 25-01-2010, 05:22 PM

Wow just read this!! ( I have an awful lot of fanfic to catch up on - you guys are so good!)
It is absolutely brilliant - the story, the writing everything!!

**A Cousin** · 08-07-2010, 02:55 PM

I. Love. This. Story!

I read it first on fanfic before finding this forum and it was one of the few that really stuck with me long past reading it and many others. Most of them get read and then fade into the abyss that is my brain. Garbage In. Garbage Out. It stuck with me because it's like watching an actual episode. There is a really nice balance between plot and character. You mesh information that is already a given in the show with new stuff added by you very nicely.

Not that I would really know any better, but the plot was plausible and well constructed. All the right terms were in all the right places. You didn't try to complicate it too much. The reader goes along on the journey of discovery with the characters.

You have the tone of the existing characters down cold and Bushra is as vibrant and well drawn as the actual Spooks characters. I like how Ruth reacted as interrogator and in the field. Sure, she's getting her a** kicked, but she is proving something to herself and developing beyond the life of the show. I like the gentle and tasteful way you resolve the H/R relationship. The covert reference to Harry asking Ruth if she still sings from 8.8 is inspired. I like that it is a beginning. It *could* have ended at chapter 7, but thanks for making us happy! Smile

Have you ever thought of becoming a screen writer or playwright?